By Jv Ramos

To the members of the audience, Gerardo "Geri" Francisco is a superb dancer and brilliant choreographer. He’s one that you can't take your eyes off from despite being surrounded by taller dancers, and as a creator of dances, he puts out one piece after another that tackles social issues and elements of Filipino culture and at the same time highlights the strength of the dancers. 

To those who are part of Ballet Manila, however, he's more than a principal dancer and resident choreographer. Geri is referred to as "Dad" as he has always stayed true to this real-life role of his, regardless of how tough and crazy his ballet schedule would get.

"Nagsimula ‘ata ang pagtawag nila sa akin ng 'Dad' kina Ma’am Lise at Shaz [artistic directors Lisa Macuja-Elizalde and Osias Barroso]. ‘Dad’ ang tawag nila sa akin kasi dinadala ko ang anak ko sa studio [his eldest Jeree]," explains Geri, trying his best to recall the beginnings of his nickname. "Mga 4 or 5 pa lang siya noon, at wala kaming katulong. Kaya ayun, habang nagka-klase, nagbabantay ako ng anak ko." (It was Ma’am Lise and Sir Shaz who started calling me ‘Dad’. And that’s because I would bring my daughter to the studio. She was only 4 or 5 at that time, and we didn’t have a helper. So what would happen was, I would look after her while doing ballet.)

The moniker “Dad” has stuck with him, even now that all his three kids are already of school age and Jeree having just graduated from senior high. This is probably because the father image is something that Ballet Manila dancers associate with him, but more so because to some of them, he has also become like a father figure. Geri, after all, would encourage his colleagues as he teaches and choreographs for them, act as the mediator between dancers and artistic directors whenever needed, and from time to time, even prepare meals for his fellow dancers. 

And while he seems to carry out these multiple roles effortlessly, even through the most challenging years of Ballet Manila, Geri points out that like every other dancer, he has been deeply affected by the pandemic. 

“Noong unang two weeks, okay-okay pa ako,” starts the award-winning choreographer. “Para lang ako nagbakasyon sa studio at nag-klase na lang sa bahay. Pero nu’ng na-extend ang two weeks na iyon, nag-worry na ako. Ako kasi ang type ng dancer na madaling ma-bore kahit dalawang araw lang ang lumipas na walang sayaw. Tapos, dahil may mga worries ako, gusto talaga ng katawan ko na talagang mag-express. Pero hindi mo kasi iyan magagawa sa maliit mong sala. Kailangan mo ng malawak na studio para talagang mailabas mo ang nararamdaman mo.” (During the first two weeks, I was feeling okay. It was like taking a two-week vacation, while having class at home. But when it was extended, I began to get worried. I’m the type of dancer who gets easily bored even if it’s just two days that pass without dancing. And since I have my worries, my body really wants to dance in order to express what I feel. But I can’t just do that in a small living room. I need the studio space so that I can really let out what I’m feeling.)

Geri also admits that the lack of regular in-studio classes and the absence of performances during the first year of the pandemic has weakened his body. “Nararamdaman ko ang pagkakaiba sa katawan ko. Kung pasayawin mo ako ngayon, baka 30 seconds pa lang ng variation, gumugulong na ako! Ang hirap ibalik sa dati.” (I really feel the change in my body. If you’d ask me to dance, I’d most likely get tired 30 seconds into the variation. It’s difficult to regain the stamina and strength that I had.)

The same goes for his choreography work. As one who draws from experiences and environments he’s exposed to, Geri has found creating new dances a struggle. He, in fact, says that he hasn’t added anything new to his special notebook where he documents his ideas for choreography. “Hindi lang dahil sa hindi ako nakakalabas at nakaka-explore. Ibang-iba na kasi ngayon. Dati, kapag may naisip ako, puwede ko na agad gawin sa studio ang naisip ko. Ngayon kasi, walang outlet. Nakaka-frustrate na may iniisip kang gawin pero hindi mo magawa.” (It’s not only because I don’t go out that much and that I’m unable to explore. The situation is really different now. Before, whenever I would have an idea for a choreography, I could immediately work on it in the studio with the dancers. Right now, there’s no outlet. It’s frustrating to have a concept and not be able to work on it.)

He was actually able to work on a choreography, Walang Hanggang Paalam, which was turned into a dance video last year for Ballet Manila’s virtual season. But he longs to do more. Despite his frustrations, however, the work continues. “Down ako ngayon pero ayaw kong magpadala,” declares Geri. (I’m down but I don’t want to give in to the feeling.)  With Ballet Manila taking a break from performance seasons due to the pandemic, this danseur’s schedule has been packed with teaching, from sometimes leading company classes to handling a variety of classes for The Lisa Macuja School of Ballet.

“Mahirap ang pag-adjust ko sa online teaching noong una. Ang dami mo nang nasabi pero nag-lag na pala ang internet mo! Bukod sa pag-set up ng equipment, hindi mo agad na-ko-correct ang dancers. Struggle ang pagturo online pero ngayon, okay na, nasanay na rin ako.” (I found it difficult to adjust to online teaching at first. I’d be explaining many things only to find out that my internet was lagging. And, apart from making sure that you have the right equipment, you cannot immediately correct dancers remotely. It’s really a struggle to teach online, but I have gotten used to it.)

For him, one thing about teaching that hasn’t changed with the transition to online is approaching his wide range of students in different ways. Geri, for instance, is especially strict with the boys’ class as this involves Ballet Manila’s scholars under its Project Ballet Futures program. Given that the scholars are now going through their formative years in ballet, he wants to help make sure that they’re receiving the best training that they can get even if it’s just through Zoom at the moment. 

“Ang laki ng potential nila, lalong-lalo na sina Angelo (de Leon) at Stanley (Alamer), kaya naman hindi kami nag-re-relax talaga. Basta’t nandiyan ang focus nila, they’re going to be the next great assets of Ballet Manila! Ang ganda ng opportunity na ibinibigay ng Ballet Manila sa kanila kaya naman lagi kong sinasabi sa kanila not to take it for granted.” (The scholars, especially Angelo and Stanley, have so much potential, which is why I refuse to be relaxed when I teach them. For as long as they’re focused, I know that they will be the next great assets of Ballet Manila! It’s a good opportunity that Ballet Manila is giving them, which is why I always remind them not to take it for granted.)

Other than being energized by training the next generation of dancers, Geri shares that it really helps he has other things going on outside ballet, namely his cooking hobby and business, and of course, spending time with his family. “Kung busy ka, naiiwasan mong isipin ang mga nakaka-down na bagay-bagay. Mahalaga rin na hindi ka nag-iisa sa panahong ito. Kung mag-isa ka kasi, mas kung anu-ano ang pumapasok sa ulo mo. Ako nga, pumasok sa utak ko ang retirement noong lockdown, at never ko talaga naisip ang retirement ko bago mag-pandemic!” (If you’re busy, you avoid thoughts that pull you down. It also helps that you’re not alone during this time. If you’re alone, all sorts of negative thoughts enter your head. Just look at me, I actually thought about my retirement, and that’s something I never thought about before the pandemic!)

Geri, however, is able to see the bright side of things, and is thankful that his family has become levels closer as they’ve stayed home.  “May ups and downs talaga ang pandemic na ito. Nawalan man ako ng studio time, mas lalo naman namin nakilala ang isa’t isa. Close kami siyempre pero iba ang pagkakilala ko ngayon sa aking pamilya kasi naibubuhos ko ang oras ko sa kanila,” he expresses with a very grateful tone.  (This pandemic really has its share of ups and downs. While I lost studio time, I was able to get to know my family better. Yes, we’re close, but I got to know them even more due to the amount of time I’m able to spend with them.)

Asked what he looks forward to once the situation is better, Ballet Manila’s “resident dad” replies that he prefers not to think much about the future, as he’s the type of person who gets frustrated whenever he’s unable to immediately do what he envisions. “Marami akong naka-line up na ideas (for choreography), pero itinabi ko na muna ang mga ito. Di bale, kapag puwede na ang lahat, makikita rin ni’yo ang mga ‘yan.” (I have many ideas that are lined up, but for now, I’ve set those aside first... But not to worry, when things are better, you will be able to see those too.)

One thing is for sure with Geri though – that he’ll continue dancing, which he refers to as his first love, for as long as he can. “Ang promise ko kasi sa self ko bago pumasok ng company ay sasayaw ako hanggang kaya ko. Laban lang lagi; kahit down ako, lalaban ako.” (I promised myself before entering this company that I would dance for as long as I could. I will keep fighting to dance; even if I’m down, I’m going to strive to dance.)

With this disposition, he continues to be a role model for other dancers. That despite being weighed down by physical restrictions, not being able to perform in front of an audience,  and having to grapple with the inevitable creative blocks, Geri is still putting in the work, going through one class and one day at a time, hoping that all these would lead to better days for all dancers.

Ten days after this interview, the dancers were allowed back into the studio on a limited basis. It was a happy day for Geri who was finally able to move again to his heart’s content. “Iba ‘yung feeling na balik-studio na kasi hindi controlled ‘yung galaw mo. You can freely express your feelings when dancing in a much bigger area than your sala. As a dancer kasi, the studio is your second home, ‘ika nga. There's no place like home, kaya it’s always good to be back where you belong.”