By Jv Ramos

If you've been dancing your entire life, it's easy to sulk and dwell on the performance time you have lost because of the coronavirus pandemic. While this reaction is completely understandable, it is very refreshing to see ballet dancers who strive to come out of this difficult situation as a better dancer and person. One who embodies this is Ballet Manila’s Shaira Comeros, who, during the early months of the enhanced community quarantine in 2020, really didn't have the ideal work-from-home situation.

Quietly promoted to company soloist amid the backdrop of the pandemic, Shaira was tasked to handle teaching Twinkle Toes and Level 1B classes at the Lisa Macuja School of Ballet, make choreography for the virtual recitals of her students, take on special projects such as dance films that Ballet Manila would come up with, and of course, continue her training through regular company classes. Though these are tasks that may seem less complicated than the company's usual line of activities during performance seasons, Shaira admits to facing difficulties, beginning with not having the tools necessary for classes.

“Nu’ng in-announce ang lockdown, nag-decide ang father namin na lumipat sa Bulacan, ang aming permanent address. Liblib po kasi ang bahay namin doon, malayo sa city. Tapos po, kami-kami lang ang nandoon kaya naisip niya na mas safe kami doon,” starts Shaira, who, like several dancers in the company, had been living in Donada, Pasay, so that they could be just steps away from the Ballet Manila studio. (When the lockdown was announced, my father decided to move to Bulacan, our permanent address. Our place there is isolated, far from the city. Also, only my relatives are there, so my dad figured that we’d be safer there.) 

Thinking that the lockdown would only last two weeks, everyone in her family packed clothes for a 14-day stay in Bulacan. Her parents, who are in the sewing business, left their equipment and materials in Pasay. “Hindi nga po ako nakapagdala ng kahit isang leotard, kaya pagkatapos ng one month, nang magkakaroon na ulit ng company class, namobrema ako kung ano ang susuotin ko.” (I didn’t even pack a single leotard, so when it was announced that company classes would resume online, I worried about what I would wear.) 

Despite having online shopping as the easiest solution, Shaira chose an option wherein she would learn more and spend less. She took up sewing, especially since this had been her family’s craft and livelihood for years. “Nagsimula ako sa simpleng mga pieces lang, katulad ng sports bra at cycling shorts. Iyon po ang sinuot ko sa mga naunang online class namin.” (My knack for sewing started with simple pieces, like sports bra and cycling shorts. I used my sewn pieces in our early online classes.)

But having no proper dance wear was just the beginning of it! Since their home in Bulacan was being refurbished, she had to start without a stable Internet connection (their home didn't have a water line yet either), dancing on floors that were being tiled, and using the grills of windows or the sliding door as her barre. Moreover, since this ballerina comes from a large, tight-knit family, it was inevitable to have relatives around all the time.

“Buti na lang po sobrang supportive po ng pamilya ko,” expresses a very appreciative-sounding Shaira. Her brother, who had built a small apartment as an extra source of income for their parents, allowed her to use the space for her classes in the meantime. Her father made her an improvised barre. Through time, she says her set-up has improved.

Asked how she has been faring with the work-from-home setup, this introvert points out that since Zoom classes aren't as demanding in preparations like physical classes, there's a tendency for her to easily lose motivation. “Dati, kapag may physical class, kailangan mo magising nang maaga, mag-ayos. Naaalala ko na lagi akong excited sa pag-prepare. Ngayon, sa Zoom, may mga times na naiisip ko na, ‘Heto na naman tayo, Zoom na naman.’” (Before, when we would have physical classes, you’d have to wake up early and organize yourself. I remember being excited each time I would prepare. This time, in Zoom, there are times when I can’t help but think, ‘Here we go again dancing on Zoom.’)

The ballerina continues, “Pag pumapasok sa utak ko ang mga negative thoughts na ganyan, nilalabanan ko talaga. As much as possible, I try to be disciplined. Nilalabanan ko na hindi mawala ang interes ko na mag-class. Sa klase ka lang kasi makakabawi; wala pa kasi ang shows sa theaters.” (Whenever such negative thoughts enter my head, I immediately fight it. As much as possible, I want to be disciplined. I fight to stay interested in class. With theaters still closed, it’s only in class that you’re able to really dance.)

Shaira also notes that giving her all in classes is her way of staying in shape. “Dahil petite po ako, blessed po with a body na more on the slender side. Pero para maalagaan ko ang katawan ko, para maiwasan ang injury, kapag may klase, 200 percent ang binibigay ko sa barre, tapos very careful ako sa center. Noong una kasi, talon lang po ako ng talon sa center, tapos na-feel ko na sumakit talaga ang shin ko. Mahirap po talaga sa aming dancers na mawalan ng studio. Hindi ka talaga makagalaw nang mabuti.”  (Because I’m petite, blessed to have a slender figure. But to take care of my body and avoid injury, whenever we have class, I make sure that I give 200 percent when doing barre, then when it comes to the center, I dance carefully. Before, I’d just jump and jump while doing center, and this led to a painful shin. It’s really difficult for us dancers to work without a studio. You can’t move freely.)

Having been away from the studio for months, it's no surprise that Shaira became so excited when she was called to the Ballet Manila studio to work on Home by British choreographer Martin Lawrance late last year. “Sa sobrang excited ko, ang dami kong dinalang gamit!,” she recalls, laughing. “Kahit via Zoom lang tinuro ni Sir Martin ang steps, sobrang na-enjoy ko ang process. Nakaka-refresh ang mag-rehearse sa studio. Iba kasi ang galaw mo doon, mas free ka! Tapos, na-feel ko din na parang bumabalik na ang dati kahit baby steps lang po.”   (I was so excited to be in the studio that I packed too many things! Even if Sir Martin only taught us the steps via Zoom, I really enjoyed the process. It’s so refreshing to rehearse in the studio again. You move differently when you’re there! Being there also made me feel like things were going back to normal, even if it’s just baby steps.)

Since her first time in the studio after the enhanced community quarantine, this soloist has been a part of other special projects of Ballet Manila, braving the road from Bulacan to Manila each time. “Basta sa pagsasayaw! Any time po, ready ako,” she underlines. (When it comes to dancing, I’m ready anytime.) Never one to say no or complain, Shaira soon found herself performing Don Quixote’s Kitri in Ballet's Greatest Hits, Ballet Manila’s dance film showing excerpts of classical pieces that the company is known for.

"Sobrang grateful ako sa opportunity na ‘yon, kahit sandali lang kami sumayaw,” comments Shaira, who danced the role with her real-life partner Joshua Enciso, also a Ballet Manila soloist, as Basilio.  “Kapag back to normal na po, gusto kong sayawin nang full-length ang role ni Kitri. Dream role ko po ‘yan ever since.” (I’m very grateful for that opportunity even if we only danced an excerpt. When things go back to normal, I’d like to be able to dance Kitri full-length. It’s been my dream role since I was young.)

The ballerina shares that while she's the total opposite of the playful and sociable heroine, what interests her about the role is the process of bringing out that feisty personality through the help of another dance form. “Noong bata pa ako, nag-take din po ako ng  flamenco at umabot po ako ng grade 5. Para ma-channel ko ang inner Kitri ko, gagamitin ko ang natutunan ko sa flamenco.” (When I was young, I also took up flamenco and I was able to reach grade 5 in the dance. To channel my inner Kitri, I’ll make use of what I’ve learned in my flamenco classes.)

As for the teaching part, like with company classes, the virtual element has made it difficult. “Dapat magaling ka mag-explain through talking lang. Kailangan isa-isa mong sinasabi. Hindi kagaya ng physical teaching na puwede mo kaagad i-approach tapos hawakan para ma-correct.” (You have to be good at explaining things with just the use of words. You have to explain every step thoroughly. It’s not like in physical teaching where you can just approach the student and adjust her body to correct her.)  

She adds that teaching younger children requires a high level of patience, as well as knowing how to make learning appear as play and how to add just the right level of discipline as they get older. “I really love teaching! I'm glad na mas na-develop ko ang skill na ito during the pandemic.”

Speaking of skills, Shaira actually developed more during over the lockdown. Her perseverance in learning how to sew eventually led to DIY creative photo shoots of her young relatives and accepting orders for customized leotards. She, too, started a small ballet-related business with Joshua called Plié Clothing. “Inumpisan namin ito dahil sa financial situation namin. Naapektuhan ng pandemic ang salary namin, kaya para ma-augment ito, nag-try kaming mag-business.” (We started this due to our financial situation. The pandemic has greatly affected our salary, so to augment it, we’re trying out having a business.)

Shaira always sports a smile that we couldn't help but ask if she's ever weighed down by the uncertainty of the pandemic. “Actually, sobrang hirap po talaga ngayon mag-stay positive,” she confesses. To combat negativity, she chooses to focus on the good things that have happened to her in the past year. "Natuto akong magturo, manahi, mag-start ng business. Nagkaroon ako ng skills na hindi ko na-a-attain dati.” (Actually, it’s really hard to have a positive outlook these days. To fight negativity, I focus on the good things that have happened to me. In the past year, I was able to sharpen my teaching skills, learn to sew and start a business. These are all things that I never attained before.)

Seeing that continuous hard work only leads to beautiful results, she’s positive that the work she puts into ballet, regardless of the situation, would lead to more roles and better performances in the future.