Called to perform: Celine Astrologo gives ballet another shot
She once doubted if ballet could be for her but now, Celine Astrologo (center, in Don Quixote last May) knows this is what she wants. Photo by Giselle P. Kasilag
By Jv Ramos
Growing up, Celine Astrologo never thought that she would end up in ballet. “Sports po kasi talaga ang hilig ko noong bata. Napunta lang ako sa ballet dahil napili akong mag-audition sa school ko.” (I was really into sports as a kid. I just got into ballet because I got picked for an audition in school.) She was nine then, and while going through the classes hosted by Academy One performing arts school, her primary thought about the dance she was doing was that it’s weird. She asked herself, “Is this really for me?”
Ballet Manila company artist Celine Astrologo is motivated by the thought that second chances don’t come often and that being a ballerina doesn’t last forever. Photo by Giselle P. Kasilag
“Wala po kasi talaga akong kaalam-alam sa ballet noon. Pinagpatuloy ko lang ang mga klase dahil gusto ko ang na-tsa-challenge.” (I really didn’t know a thing about ballet then. I just continued with the classes because I like being challenged.) Celine explains that she loves the feeling of being able to accomplish something she couldn’t do before, and ballet constantly offered her just that. Whenever she’d achieve a combination, she’d find a bigger challenge waiting for her.
“Pero hindi ko pa rin ito inisip na gawing career,” claims the ballerina. “Isang extracurricular activity lang ito sa akin na pinagsasabay ko sa soccer training.” (But I still didn’t see a career in ballet. I just saw it as another extracurricular activity which I did together with soccer training.) Things only changed when she entered the Philippine High School for the Arts in Makiling, and she began getting more exposed to more roles and other aspects of ballet. “Mas nagustuhan ko na ang ballet nu’ng may pina-practice na akong mga solos at nu’ng pinapagawa na kami ng choreography.” (I enjoyed ballet more when I began practicing solos and when we were being asked to do choreography.) It also helped that the prima ballerina herself, Ballet Manila artistic director Lisa Macuja-Elizalde, taught every Wednesday in the school.
Thinking beyond technique, Celine is also working on her artistry as a ballet dancer and on building up her confidence on stage. Photo by MarBi Photography
“Nu’ng nag-decide ako na gawing career ang ballet, Ballet Manila ang una kong naisip dahil dito rin nanggaling ’yung mga unang teachers ko na sina Teacher Pam (Espejo) at Teacher Jeff (Espejo).” (When I decided to make a career out of ballet, Ballet Manila was my first choice because it’s where my first teachers came from.) And because she went through the same Vaganova training which Ballet Manila practices, she thought that she could easily excel in the company’s Summer Intensive.
“Akala ko magaling na ako noon, pero nu’ng pagtapak ko rito, mas marami pa palang magagaling. Average lang pala ko at ang dami kong kailangang habulin.” (I thought that I was already good, but when I arrived here, there were so many dancers better than me. I realized that I was just average and I had plenty to catch up on.) Due to her love for challenges, she managed to improve during the intensive, resulting in a contract offer to join the junior company.
“Snow White ang pinaka-unang production ko sa company,” the ballerina reminisces. “At kahit maliit lang ang role ko, mahirap maging bunny dahil kitang-kita kung magkamali ka!” (Snow White was my first production with the company. And even if my role was small, being a bunny was difficult because it’s obvious if you make a mistake.)
Realizing how much she missed ballet, Celine (center, in Gerardo Francisco’s Ibong Adarna last August) is glad to be able to return to it. Photo by Giselle P. Kasilag
Celine underlines that being part of the corps de ballet isn’t an easy task. Every step of each corps member must be precise or one’s mistake would ruin the overall look. “Hanggang ngayon, ’yan pa rin ang kinakatakutan ko, na magkamali bilang corps, lalo na sa mga classics!” (Until today, my biggest fear is to make a mistake as part of the corps, especially when we dance the classics.)
Promoted to company artist at the beginning of 2020, Celine was on a high after just a year with Ballet Manila, but soon, like many during the pandemic, she lost her energy for what she loved most. “Naalog po talaga ang mental health ko noong time na ’yon. Naisip ko kasi na walang napuntahan ang mga pinaghirapan ko noong 2019. Sobrang binigay ko po kasi ang lahat ng kaya ko noon.” (The pandemic greatly affected my mental health. The thought that everything I worked hard on in 2019 was just wasted haunted me. I really did give it my all then.)
Dancing in Rudy De Dios’ Carmina Burana in March 2020 was one of the last performances of Celine (right) before the pandemic hit. Photo by Giselle P. Kasilag
Celine confesses that when she stopped taking Zoom classes with the company in 2021, she really intended to quit ballet for good. But she changed her mind after taking on a ballet gig that was passed on to her by her friend Nicole Barroso, former Ballet Manila soloist. The random opportunity actually made her realize there’s no other activity that could make her feel happy than ballet.
Being part of the corps, says Celine (third from left, as a wili in Giselle in 2019), scares her because it’s obvious when one makes a mistake. Photo by Giselle P. Kasilag
“Ballet pala ang hinahanap ng katawan ko, kaya naman nagplano talaga ako na makabalik ako!” (It turned out ballet was what my body had been looking for, so I really planned to return to it.) Celine shares that since she was out of shape and hadn’t trained in a long time, she took tiny steps towards her comeback, but made sure to set deadlines. “Inisip ko na sa buwan na ito, dapat may contract na ako, at sa isang buwan naman dapat nakakasabay na ako sa corps na suot-suot ang pointe shoes. Importante na may goals and deadlines ka sa ballet, pero ang pinaka-importante, ang desisyon na gusto mo pa talaga sumayaw!” (I would think that by this month, I should be getting a contract. And by another month, I should be able to dance with the corps wearing pointe shoes. It’s important for you to have goals and deadlines in ballet, but what’s most important is the decision that you still really want to dance.)
The Ballet Manila company member underlines that everything begins with the desire to dance. “Na-miss ko talaga ang feeling na mag-perform sa harap ng audience at gusto ko itong mabalikan. Buti na lang binigyan ako ng second chance ni Ma’am Lisa!” (I really missed the feeling of performing before an audience and I wanted to go back to that. It’s a good thing Ma’am Lisa gave me a second chance!) Celine adds that one of her big motivators now is the thought that second chances don’t come often and that being a ballerina doesn’t last forever. “Grateful ako sa bawat sayaw na ibinibigay sa akin, at siyempre, wino-work ko rin na mag-improve.” (I’m grateful for every dance that’s given to me and of course, I work on improving myself.)
Celine shares that this time around, she thinks beyond technique. She’s also working on her artistry as a ballet dancer, which she addresses through Femme classes. “Dance class po siya na very feminine at fierce ang movements at nakakatulong ito sa confidence ko. Kailangan ko kasing i-address ang pagiging confident ko on stage dahil nawala talaga ito noong pandemic.” (It’s a dance class that’s very feminine and fierce, and it helps with my confidence. I have to build my stage confidence since I felt I lost it during the pandemic.)
In 2019, Celine (third from left) and Rodney Catubay – now both Ballet Manila company artists – are interviewed by Lisa Macuja-Elizalde (left) for her Art 2 Art program, along with Cherish Garcia, head of Academy One where the two learned ballet. Photo by Susan A. De Guzman
Outside ballet, this dance artist makes sure that she engages in activities that support her mental health. “Para mawala ang gulo ng isip, lumalalabas ako ng Maynila. Nag-ha-hike kasama ang mga kaibigan. At kung hindi naman puwedeng lumabas, marami po akong fiction na binabasa kaysa nakababad lang sa cellphone. Nakatulong din talaga ang faith sa pagbalik ko sa ballet.” (To find peace of mind, I go out of Manila. I hike with friends. And if it’s not possible to leave, I read a lot of fiction rather than just being hooked on my cellphone. My faith has also played a big role in my return to ballet.)
Asked what her ballet dreams are, Celine replies that she’d love to portray strong female leads like Carmen in Carmen and Violetta in La Traviata. “Gusto ko rin na makasayaw ng napakaraming roles bago dumating ang time na kailangan nang mag-retire.” (I also want to dance as many roles as I can before retirement time comes.)
Celine shares that she’d love to portray strong female leads like Carmen in Carmen and Violetta in La Traviata. Photo by Giselle P. Kasilag
